I thought I would send in two metaphors I use with clients. It keeps things simple but they seem to work well. The first was created by Sir Mason Durie, A NZ Maori, orignially meant for use in a health arena. It is called Te Whare Tapa Wha or the four walls of a house. Instead of a hierarchy there are four interconnected walls that from a strong resilient structure 1 Tinana - The body 2 Hinengaro - The mind 3 Whanau - Family - social - relationships 4 Wairua - Spirit Other people have noted that a house must sit in the land - environment - context I have added two more things. A traditional Maori meeting house is built to be like the body of an ancestor - usually the original ancestor for the tribe and the inside is filled with carvings of the ancestors. So to go into the house is to go into the past. We always carry the past with us, both the wonders of the culture that support and sustain and the trauma and hurt. The second is that the carving on the top of the roof at the front is called a tekoteko, usually a guardian warrior alert in case there are any threats to the people. This is like mindfulness and impacts on how well the four walls can function. The second is my idea of a horse and coach. The horses are the emotions The driver is thinking The coach is the body The passenger is beliefs and values. Horses are extremely powerful and provide the motive power for the horse and coach - No emotion and you don't go anywhere. If they see something like a snake on the road, they can bolt ... - fight/flight/freeze. If you let the horses go where they want, you could end up anywhere. Horses are tied to the coach. The driver must control the horses. Speed up/slow down, care for the horses, feed them, give them rest. well controlled horses get to do what they like doing - running just in a way the supports the whole horse and coach. The driver must check out the road ahead for hazards etc, i.e. be anticipatory. The driver has a map supplied by the passenger. It ,may be a good map that clearly shows the way, or it might be a faulty map that sees the horse and coach going back to a place that is not that helpful. The driver must obey the rules of the road and manage other horses and coaches on the road. the driver must maintain alertness t notice any changes or other relevant information about the horse, coach and the environment and respond to it in a timely fashion. AN addiction is like a short cut that looks great until you get round the bends and the road becomes bumpy and difficult and does not end where you want. The driver needs to stop and talk to other drivers about the road ahead The driver must tend to the coach, repair and maintain it and stay on the seat. The passenger gets to say where the driver should take the horse and coach. Whereas the driver looks forward to where the coach is headed, the passenger looks to the back. and notices the patterns that arise. If the driver is alert they will initiate a conversation with the passenger about the intended destination. The driver could alert the passenger to delays, difficulties, alternative places to go etc. The passenger's luggage is tied on top. If there is too much luggage or it is insecurely tied, it may fall off and break. If two horses and coaches choose to travel in convoy one set of horses could spook the other. The drivers might disagree. They may want to go to other destinations etc. -- Victor MacGill PhD https://urldefense.proofpoint.com/v2/url?u=http-3A__www.victormacgill.com&d=DwIDaQ&c=eLbWYnpnzycBCgmb7vCI4uqNEB9RSjOdn_5nBEmmeq0&r=HPo1IXYDhKClogP-UOpybo6Cfxxz-jIYBgjO2gOz4-A&m=XmMJv6MiGUmMqQ3Nytr7YiX7-Q1w9lltNxbXnDJHM_A&s=G_iLNIQaoKwMIrsQCq9WMEsfv1KhhvXuuh24t71eKH0&e= Author of When the Dragon Stirs: Healing our Wounded lives through Fairy Stories, Myths and Legends and Gonna Lay Down my Sword and Shield: A complexity perspective on human evolution from a Violent Past to a Compassionate Future ############################ To unsubscribe from the TOK-SOCIETY-L list: write to: mailto:[log in to unmask] or click the following link: http://listserv.jmu.edu/cgi-bin/wa?SUBED1=TOK-SOCIETY-L&A=1